by Tommy Boyce and Bobby Hart

Ev'ryone in town knew Mr. Webster;
He worked at the bank for forty years.
And each week Mr. Frizby made his check out
For sixty-eight dollars clear.

And thru the years he thwarted twenty-seven robberies
And each time Frizby promised him a raise.

They gave a retirement party for Mr. Webster
Everyone from the bank was there.
They had a cake and flowers ordered special
And Frizby had a speech prepared.

And a little white box that held a watch with this inscription
"To Mr. Webster, with regards."

Then came the telegram from Mr. Webster
Said, "Sorry...stop...Cannot attend..
I've flown away and taken all your money
Wish you were here to help me spend."

And one by one all the people left the party
And Mr. Frizby locked the door.