There's a thing or two about high school that you need
to know
We wish we had known this when we were freshmen

Watch out for Freshman Friday: the most dangerous day
of the week
You thought you were excited for the weekend
But this is where your week ends

Four more years of obeying authority
Without question
Don't reach super sighted
There's only 1, 416 pages left to read
It will be time to celebrate, when it's time to
graduate

Whatever you do
Don't you ever bring a roller backpack to school
Because douchebag kids will kick them over
We don't see why, though
They're really convenient!

If a girl gives you a smile, don't be deceived
She wants you to father her child
And he's probably not even cute!

The only good about high school
Is that there's super badass playgrounds
They have the best swings ever!
I once jumped five feet in the air!

Four more years of obeying authority
Without question
Don't reach super sighted
There's only 1, 416 pages left to read
It will be time to celebrate, when it's time to
graduate

To think about how happy I was before I came
Running out of every room I walked in today
But the most miserable part
Is that it's only the first day

If high school was compared to seeing your mom in a
Playboy Magazine
Then maybe high school isn't that bad
'Cause that'd be the biggest boner kill in history
Unless she's hot!