I woke up on the ground
I guess I shoulda kept that shit to myself
Turns out, I'm pretty good at runnin' my mouth
But not good enough (Not good enough)
You know, when I go in
It's lights out (It's lights out)
I couldn't hear a thing
'Cause the song was too loud (Was too loud)
Last night I had thirty-two teeth in my mouth
Some went away
Why'd you have to go and fucking ruin my day?

You're the reason why I got my ass kicked
But you're the only way to drown my sadness
This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked

I was laid out flat like a centerfold (Centerfold)
Jakey and his partner drove me home
Lookin' in the mirror, something's wrong
Lеt me get my dentist on thе phone (On the phone)
Found my keys, then I went back out
Someone asked me how it all went down
I remember like it's yesterday (Like it's yesterday)
I took a shot, took a shot
Took a shot, took another shot
Fell right out my fuckin' chair
Swingin' for his eye
Then a big chrome ring flew in from the side
I thought I died
Why'd you have to go and fuckin' ruin my night?

You're the reason why I got my ass kicked
But you're the only way to drown my sadness
This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked