don't bother going to class,
cuz nobody cares if you cut.
and its not smart to experiment,
with ben gay on your nuts.

if you ask her out and she says maybe,
what she really means is no way.
and if you try jerking off behind the backstop,
the team will be playing that day. (oh God)

these are the things,
i wish i knew,
there are the things i wish i knew,
in highschool.
yeah these are the things,
i wish i knew in highschool.

don't call the head jock a fag,
even if it's true.
and don't hold our for that one special girl,
cuz she'll never have sex with you. (no way)

these are the things,
i wish i knew,
there are the things i wish i knew,
in highschool.
yeah these are the things,
i wish i knew in highschool.

don't let 'em see you cryin,
no matter how it hurts.
and nobody ever got laid,
cuz they were wearin' a Rush t-shirt

these are the things,
i wish i knew,
there are the things i wish i knew,
in highschool.
yeah these are the things,