I longed for her when I was just 18
She was so pure to me I couldn't even picture her nude
And when she told me she didn't want to be my lover
I cried for hours up on Carlton Hill
While the sun set behind the unfinished monument

(Tragedy and farce)

Ten years later at my sister's wedding
Drunk on champagne in an upstairs room
She let me take off her all her clothes

I'd had to wait so long for that first embrace
From that miserable day in '78
The first dry kiss
To this!

She invited me back to her empty place
Where the irony hit me like a slap in the face

(Tragedy and farce)

Either I was too big or she was too small
But there was no way on earth we would ever ball
Not even Vaseline and a lot of mutual pain
Could put Humpty Dumpty together again
Like a square peg forced into a round hole
This into that just wouldn't go
Though of course
We could still kiss

History plays the first time as tragedy, the second as farce