I am cursed with a strange delusion:
I imagine myself to be
The only creature in the world that desires
And reproduces sexually

And everybody else is an amoeba
A tapeworm, a eunuch or virus

(Nicholas, don't be so ridiculous, Nicholas)

So I sit on the tube trying desperately to conceal
This embarrassing anomaly
This sin particular to me

For I, uniquely, must carry the rose
I, uniquely, have a cock beneath my clothes
And dream uniquely lewd dreams in front of multiplex screens

IT'S AS THOUGH I
(AND I ALONE)
SHOULD BE PUNISHED FOR THE UNIVERSAL SIN
Which reminds me of someone
But I am not like Him
I am the only animal in the world that desires
Wandering lost amidst cathedral spires
Sacrificed on behalf of the general
Possessor of an unruly genital

Amongst the dead I beat my breast
Proclaim my sinful proclivity
For simply living outside captivity
Sexually, as if I were unique, and the world uniquely unforgiving

Somebody please understand me!
Tell me you feel the same way!

(Nicholas, don't be so ridiculous Nicholas)

So I sit on the bus trying furiously to conceal
This inexplicable lust, this outlandishly physical zeal
That, if I were to reveal, would seem simply surreal

In your eyes when you realise
I think differently from you
Amidst the phallic towers
Amidst the birds, the bees and flowers
The people too


IT'S AS THOUGH
I (AND I ALONE)
SHOULD BE PUNISHED FOR THE UNIVERSAL SIN
Which reminds me of someone
But I am not like Him
I am the only animal in the world that desires
Being ushered towards my funeral pyre
The example, the victim, the criminal
Possessor of an unruly genital

Won't someone understand me
Help me bear the strain
Say they feel the same way
Say I'm not to blame