I'll be your frilly military lady
Your long-haired lover from France
Meet me in an electronic Liverpool
At an electronic dance
Wearing padded shoulders in a padded cell
Throwing phone numbers in a wishing well
I'll join the frilly military, what the hell
It's got to be good for a laugh
See you in the acid bath

Last one to the blackboard is a hairy pig
Hairy like a pig in the zoo
Bet that I can beat you in a fairy wig
Playing on a strawberry kazoo
Cos I'm the big sister that you never had
Beating up on brother making fun of dad
The best big bully that you never had
You can pull on my pony tail
If you want to spend your life in jail
You can pull on my pony tail
If you want to spend your life in jail

(Whistling)

Flirty's what they call me at the convent school
Dirty's what I'm called on the street
Puffing on a spliff on Alexanderplatz
Or a bergamot cheroot
Long haired lovers from Liverpool
Truckers made of sugar by the swimming pool
I'll join the frilly military, what the hell
You can pull on my pony tail
But you'll have to spend your life in jail
Well you can pull on my pony tail
If you want to spend your life in jail

Wearing padded shoulders in a padded cell
Throwing phone numbers down a wishing well
I'll be your frilly military what the hell
It's got to be good for a laugh
See you in the acid bath