I take my baby to the cornfield
I lay him down between the rows
I ask him if he really loves me
He tells me only heaven knows

If I owned a TV station
This is the message I would send
A hundred strenuous acquaintances
can't meet the loss of one true friend

Give me his old Montana jacket
His favorite shirt is Panama
And I can tell you where he's buried
Tell you the last thing that he saw, saw
I am the keeper of your fetish
There is so much that you don't know
You're gonna drown in your own bathtub
You're gonna miss me when I go

If I owned that big transmitter
This is the message I would send
A hundred strenuous acquaintances
can't meet the loss of one true friend

And on the mornings after parties
I pick the bottles from the floor
I open every single window
I cough until my ribs are sore
Callin' out to all you vampires
"I got molasses in my veins!
I think it's time I should be leavin'
And you can fight for my remains! "
For every word on every paper
For every dollar you will spend
A strenuous acquaintances
can't meet the loss of one true friend
The loss of one true friend