Terrible tudors, gorgeous georgians
Slimy stuarts, vile victorians
Woeful wars, ferocious fights
Dingy castles, daring knights!

Horrors that defy description
Cut-throat celts, awful egyptians
Vicious vikings, cruel crimes
Punishments from ancient times!

Romans, rotten, rank and ruthless
Cavemen, savage, fearsome, toothless
Groovy greeks, rainy sieges
Mean and measly middle ages!

Gory stories we do that
And your host's a talking rat
The past is no longer a mystery
Welcome to horrible histories