Ohh, listen up
Young man, there's a-- there's a young man, he writes stories
He's a writer, a little writer boy
He falls in love with a girl, girl already has a boyfriend
She kinda loves him back, but not really
They're just really good friends, and that's fine
He understands, it's rational

Hi. What's your name? How are you? How's your life?
Oh, you got a man? Are you in love? If so, what type?
Is it just platonic, strictly just as friends
Or the type that ties you two together 'til tomorrow's end?
If it is, disregard every time I call you pretty
Though it's meant sincerely, it's just my imagination drifting
Brush me off like the dirt on Jay-Z's shoulders
So I fall to ground, collect myself and get ready to take over your heart
Or at least your spare time

And I love the thought of being with you
Or maybe it's the thought of not being so alone
Hey, the second one's way sadder than the first one
But I don't know
I love the thought of being with you
Or maybe it's the thought of not being so alone
The second one's way sadder than the first one
But I don't know

We should go and get a friggin' cup of coffee
And I'll act friendly and I won't pull any stunts
But I'm a little stunt puller from birth
So I don't know what to tell you
If I try to confess my love for
Scones
I just wanna say something real quick, please shh, listen
I love
These scones
Just the diversity between the selection they have here
The blueberry, the raspberry, strawberry, pumpkin
Even which is basically a friggin' squash
How they gonna make a scone out of a freaking squash?
Ohh, wow, wow
That shit blows my mind
That's Elon Musk just in his little lab cooking up, baby
But what were you talking about?
Oh yeah, your boyfriend made you mad the other day?
What was he saying? Oh, what do I think? Hmm
He was being mean at that part-- point?
But I'm sure he's gonna turn around at some... point, as well
And

I love the thought of being with you
Or maybe it's the thought of not being so alone
The second one's way sadder than the first one
But I don't know
I love the thought of being with you, woah, woah, woah
Or maybe it's the thought of not being so alone
Shit, I love being-- I love being loved, but
Don't like crying on the phone

Hi, wassup?
Yeah, what's going on?
Oh yeah, she told me a lot about you, yeah, uh-huh
It's so great you're doing all of those things
You should keep doing all of them I think
Oh yeah, my name's Hobo Johnson
People like to say I'm a rapper, I'm actually not
I produced this myself, I'm hella fucking proud of it
But yeah, she like-- she's so nice
She was so nice and cared about me, no one else did
Literally, I don't think I've ever felt love before that
She's a peach
Scone
She's a peach scone, yes
And

I love the thought of being with her
I just really hope that she doesn't get hurt, y'know?
They say it takes two years to come back down to Earth
From that lovely place that you've been, I heard it's so nice
Good for you guys, I'm-- I'm glad
(Being so alone)
And if you find someone who loves you for who you are
Keep loving 'em, man
'Cause that shit happens like, once in a lifetime, y'know?
And who am I to get in the way of someone living their lifetime Y'know?
And I hope you're doing really well, I haven't talked to you in a while
But uh, I found someone else who really loves me for who I am
But I don't call them enough, and that's why they moved away
I'm gonna call them right now, she wants me to call her
Okay
Bye