Frodo, don’t wear the ring. I know it’s very tempting. Yes, you will appear to disappear, But the dark riders they’ll know you’re there. Yes, Lord Sauron has many spies… EUGENE (as Saruman) Many spies, have many eyes… JEMAINE AND BRET One ring to bind them, to find them, One ring to rule them all, One ring to bind them, one to find them, One ring to rule them ALLLLLLL!!! Yea, Little Frodo! You’ve got to rule them, Frodo, rule them with the ring Come on ruuuule them with your ring! EUGENE (as Saruman) Lord Sauron has many spies, beasts and birds. MEL (as Arwen) If you want him, come and claim him! BRET (as Frodo) Do they, Gandalf? MURRAY (as Gandalf) I am not a conjurer of cheap tricks! JEMAINE (as Sam) I can’t carry the ring But I can carry you, Mr. Frodo. DAVE (as Aragorn) You have my sword, BRET (as Legolas) And my bow, DAVE (as Gimli) And my axe! MEL (as Arwen) Noro nim mish fir mar nim nor! JEMAINE (as Sam) Mordor… DAVE (as Aragorn) We’ll never make it. There’s thousands of them and only nine of us… BRET (as Frodo with ring) Ohhhh… DAVE (as Aragorn) We made it… BRET (as Frodo) Hurray, we made it. BRET AND JEMAINE Yo Frodo, what you doin’ wearing the ring? All powerful jewelry, is that your new thing? I know it’s hard when you’re little more than 3 foot 4 Your little ass so close to the floor. Trying to lead the fellows to the gates of Mordor The Fellowship! (Yea the fellowship) I don’t rap about bitches and hos, I rap about witches and trolls, just passing on the words of the Elven king, Wisdom to all Frodo! Don’t wear the ring! JEMAINE AND BRET Frodo don’t wear the ring, The magical bling bling, You’ll never be the Lord of the Rings