The most important thing that we've ever learned
The most important thing we've learned as far as children are concerned
Is never, never let them near the television set
Or better still just don't install the idiotic thing at all

Never, never let them
Never, never let them
Never, never let them
Never, never let them

It rots the senses in the head
It keeps imagination dead
It clogs and clutters up the mind
It makes a child so dull and blind
So dull, so dull

He can no longer understand a fairytale, a fairyland
A fairyland, a fairyland
His brain becomes as soft as cheese
His thinking powers rust and freeze
He cannot think he only sees

Regarding little Mike Teavee
We very much regret that we
Regret that we
Shall simply have to wait and see
Wait and see, wait and see, wait and see, wait and see, wait and see
We very much regret that we
Shall simply have to wait and see
If we can get him back to his height,
But if we can't...
It serves him right!