I got a hoe from the east, I got a hoe from the west
Got a hoe who likes to jerk it off and rob it in a chest
I got a bitch from the north, I got a bitch from the south
I got a bitch who like to suck it long and hold it in her mouth
I got a bitch with air, a bitch with none
A bitch with a knife, a bitch with a gun
A bitch with an ass big as a tv set
And there's a bitch over there

Hey, the one I'm gonna get or maybe not!
She might not like me, though
No sweat to a vet, I rock her sister, though
Or I rock the whole damn heard
Fuck them all and leave them on a curb
I got a bitch with a mink, who likes a fat gold ling
Who likes to fuck me with an ass upon the kitchen sink

I got a bitch with tits, a bitch with ass
A bitch with none, but hey, I give her a pass, and I love them all!
I love them crazily, and they love me back
That's why they stay with me!
If you're having girl problems I feel bad for you, son
I got 99 problems and the bitch ain't one
Hit me!

99 Problems and the bitch ain't one!
If you're having girl problems I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems and the bitch ain't one
Hit me!
99 Problems and the bitch ain't one!

I got a bitch, this old, a bitch, this new
A bitch who loves velvet and the colours blue
I got a bitch this fat, a bitch this built
A bitch who all the titties give powder milk
I got a bitch who's funny, a bitch who ain't
A bitch who can sing, a bitch who can't
I got a bitch who loves fucking on airplane
I even got a bitch who have soul train
I got a bitch who owns rock top bands, long ends!
I got a bitch who's broke as a plum
But she's the most fun!

I got a bitch who plays piano, a bitch who don't
A bitch who dances naked, a bitch who won't
A bitch who's short, a bitch who's tall
A bitch who burns my phone and probably calls
And I love them all, I love them crazily
And they love me back, that's why they stay with me
So if you're having girl problems I feel bad for you, son
I got 99 problems and the bitch ain't one

Hit me!
99 Problems and the bitch ain't one!
If you're having girl problems I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems and the bitch ain't one
Hit me!
99 Problems and the bitch ain't one!

I got a bitch who loves the g
She'll fuck you right after she fucks me
I got a bitch who loves boats
I got a bitch who loves handcuffs and ropes
I got a bitch that's fast, a bitch who's slow
A bitch that's a virgin, and a bitch that's a hoe
A bitch that lies, a bitch that's true
A bitch who's a man, because your bitch is too!

I got a bitch this cool, a bitch this hot
A bitch who loves rap, a bitch who loves rock
A bitch who's lost, and one who knows where is at
She gets up on me and purrs like a cat
I got a bitch that runs, a bitch that walks
A bitch she yells, a bitch she talks
A bitch this dirty, a bitch this mean

A super fan bitch that I not to... Me
Then I love them all, I love them crazily
And they love me back, that's why they stay with me
So if you're having girl problems I feel bad for you, son
I got 99 problems and the bitch ain't one

Hit me!
99 Problems and the bitch ain't one!
If you're having girl problems I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems and the bitch ain't one
Hit me!
99 Problems and the bitch ain't one!