I'll never gonna be the handyman around the house
My father warned
So don't be asking me to hang the curtain right for you
Because
The screwdriver business just gets me confused
It takes me half an hour to change a fuse
And when I flick the switch, the lights all blew
I'm not your handyman

Don't be expecting me to put up shelves
Or build the garden shed
But I can write a song that tells the world
How much I love you instead
I'm not any good at pottery
So let's lose a "T", and just shift back to "E"
And I'll find a way to make my poetry
Build a roof over our head

I know it looks like I'm just reading the paper
But these ideas I'll turn to gold dust later
Cause I'm a writer, not a decorator
I'm not your handyman