Thanks for the invitation
To come to your house at nine.
I'd love to visit you today but
I feel I must decline.

I know that you have lots of pets,
Not one of them is a cat;
No dogs, no hamsters or any
Furry, fuzzy thing like that.

I know that you love reptiles like
Lizards, newts and skinks.
I fear my fear forbids me
To come in for a drink.

I know that when you greet me,
You will invite me in
And once I am inside
And ask you how you've been,

I'll see that on your sofa
Sits a hungy crocodile;
You'll clear a spot for me
And ask if I will stay awhile.

Freezing in my tracks and
Careful not to make a sound,
I'll hear a rattle at my back
And slowly turn around

Copperheads and cottonmouths
Will slither 'round your feet.
With a lizard on your shoulder
You'll say, "Have something to eat. "

I'll feel something against my leg;
It's just your alligator.
I'll jump, I'll be a bit on edge;
I won't wanna irritate her.

You'll show me your pet python
And tell me how you picked her,
While wrapped around my leg
Is your boa constrictor.

You'll show me asps and muggers,
Lizards newts and skinks;
I'll hear my heartbeat beat so fast
As you pour me that drink

But sitting in your kitchen sink
Will be your pet iguana,
So I thank you for inviting me
But I don't think I wanna