I know this sounds funny but I'm afraid that it's true
There's something so simple I simply can't do
Lots of people talkin'; you'd laugh if you knew
I just never learned how to tie my shoe

I'm sure its a question of aptitude;
Talent is something that I exude
But none of my talents seem to include
How to tie up the lace on my shoe

Now some folks laugh when they hear the news
I think their behavior is awfully rude
They ask me to dance, I have to refuse
I just don't know how to tie my shoes

Everyday I work so hard--and there's stuff I can do
I can play the guitar, I can sing you the blues
I can sing falsetto, sing bass, too,
I just can't seem to tie my shoe