Everybody wonders what anaesthetists do While the patient is asleep Everybody wonders what we do for three hours While that machine goes beep Everybody reckons we drink coffee and we gossip And we're generally subversive Everybody reckons we do crosswords and Sudoku And we chat up all the nurses
But you do you really think that's all we do? Well let me tell you now it isn't true Cos we sometimes check the screen And every now and then we write stuff And if we have to intervene We inject a bit of white stuff And we offer to alter the lights, or the height of the bed Or fiddle with the radio, or we change the CD We even check the patient occasionally And if they move we'll turn up to vapour And then we go back to read the paper Cos when the patient's asleep We just sit and listen to the beep We just sit and listen to the
Once upon a time I took pride in my job But now I think it's time to depart Cos I just sit here every day and listen to blips of the heart