I heard you've been wondering
How I'm getting along
I guess you think I can't make it with you gone
But I don't want you to worry
Don't you lose any sleep
But a man called long-distance this morning
Said they're thinking about putting me
On the cover of the USA Today
The story of heart-breaking pain
Picture of the loneliest man they claim in the USA Today

I don't sleep in the nighttime
Darkness reminds me of you
I lost eight pounds since last Tuesday
But I could stand to lose a few
I don't believe I'm too bad
People say I look fine
The man from the paper seems happy
Says I'm bigger than the latest crime
On the cover of the USA Today
The story of heart-breaking pain
Picture of the loneliest man they claim in the USA Today

So if you're concerned in trouble
Then you're hurting me
Don't you work out this little thing called losing you
Has made a big man out of me
I'm on the cover of the USA Today
The story of heart-breaking pain
Picture of the loneliest man they claim in the USA Today